If you’re part of my community, then you know that last weekend I hosted my Untangled Live event in Vancouver. It was two days of pure magic. I got to work with 150 beautiful women as they confronted their fear and pain and dug deep to have some life-changing revelations.
By far, the most intense session of the weekend was the work that we did on the inner child. There was pain, vulnerability, truth, love, and lots and lots of tears. As in we were passing five boxes of tissues around the entire auditorium tears. It was beautiful and transformational and just validated how important inner child work is to become the highest, best, and most authentic version of yourself.
Which is why I’m gonna break it down for you today. Here are my top three tips to help you access your inner child:
#1: Stop Outsourcing Your Inner Child’s Needs
So often when we have an internal need, we externalize it and make it someone else’s emergency. Like the need for love, comfort, or safety. Each and every one of us have the ability to feel completely whole. The external world should only add value to your experience, not define it. When you dwell in a space of external emotional codependency, you lose your power. Instead, reflect on your inner needs and fulfill them yourself.
#2: Understand Your Needs
So how exactly do you do that? By asking your inner child questions, like:
What do you need right now?
How can I love you more?
When you feel stressed or anxious, rather than numbing out with food or distracting with social media, take a minute and check in with your inner child. Ask the questions above, and listen to the answer your body gives. There is so much wisdom and knowledge in the body. Sensations are just information. Same with emotions. When you ignore that information, it can become difficult to access it.
After you check in with your inner child, make sure you follow up with action to complete the trust cycle. The more you do these inner child check ins and follow through with what is being asked of you, the more trust you will build in your body and intuition. You’ll also begin to realize that you have the ability to heal the parts of you that need to be healed. You, as an adult, can be the mother or father that your inner child never had but so desperately wants.
Incorporating more play into your life is a total game changer. Just because you’re older doesn't mean that you need to stop having fun. Play infuses so much joy and creativity into your life. Stop for a minute and just think back to when you were young and how you could express yourself so freely. So ask yourself daily:
What can I do to have more fun today?
What would fun and play look like in my life today?
Our lives are so freakin’ structured. We’re conditioned to obsess over productivity and achieving our goals. That’s boring AF. Instead, give yourself permission to have fun as you do your inner child work. And if you need some help connecting with your inner child, I want to share with you the ninja trick that always helps me:
Ask yourself what your inner child would do.
Seriously, stop and ask, “If my inner child was to make my next decision, what would she choose to do?” Whatever answer you receive – that’s your truth. Your inner child’s decisions and expressions are a direct reflection of your truth.
So whether it’s singing, having a dance party, writing, painting, or eating all the tacos – go and do the thing. Allow yourself to be in that expression of play and joy. Play without an end goal. Do it just to have fun and let your inner child run free.
Go on…I double dog dare ya 😉
P.S. To watch the video version of Access Your Inner Child, click here.
P.P.S. – If you're ready to take the next step and finally end your battle with food, you're ready for the Society. Click here to apply.